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Brunswick ME
September 1, 2014, 9:38 am
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An exchange between a budding writer and her college mentor

December time

dark, starry December sky
days get shorter and nights get longer until the winter solstice is upon us
snowflakes drifting from the sky
wishing for more sun
yet, loving all the stars
chills run up and down your spine
souls hungry for warmth
geece migrating,
squirles insolating
bears hibornating
snow piling high flake by flake
dark starry December sky

Wow! When I read your poem, I feel immersed in a familiar experience – frigid New England Decembers. I especially like how, among the various images of wintry things going on, only the image of drifting snowflakes involves movement. Even this movement is muted, slow, and soft. This gives the poem an overall sense of stillness, frozenness, and coldness. Additionally, the fact that this image appears toward the beginning and end of the poem makes you feel like you’ve come full circle when you finish reading it. I also like how you use non-physical imagery: in particular, “souls hungry for warmth” is a powerful metaphor. (By the way, make sure to pay attention to spelling, even in a poem.)
-Jesse

hi Jesse,
thank you for the comments. I used to be ashamed of my writing and always thought it was terrible but having someone tell me how good it is really means a lot to me! I have been quite buzy and so I am super sorry that I have not been able to type you back much. What is your favorite type of writing?, realistic fiction,essay’s etc.